Kuzul

Calm down.

…Relax

…Take a deep breath

Are we good?  Great.

Now, for all you Yankees fans and Yankees haters out there, I just want to let you know your worst fears or best hopes will not come to fruition.  The Yankees will be fine.  Yes, I took the plunge; the Yankees will be fine.*

(*Do I have a crystal ball you ask? No, but do you?)

In recent weeks, the Yankees have seen other teams improve quite dramatically while they have “sat back” and done nothing.  Their prize free-agent target Cliff Lee, the toy they HAD to have, spurned their offer and returned to Philadelphia.  Their arch-enemy, inter-divisional foe, the Boston Red Sox, made a splash for a former San Diego first baseman and a speedy left fielder.  

So yes, if you feared that the Yankees would lose out on Cliff Lee and that Boston would actually try to improve themselves after missing the playoffs, your worst nightmares have come true.  While at the  same time, if you were hoping the opposite of what was just mentioned above, than you are probably either popping the champagne corks or naming your child Cliff or Adrian.  Hell, maybe you’re doing both.

However, with this said, we must all take a step back and look at this “situation” the Yankees find themselves in with a rational perspective.  We must check our biases at the door and ask ourselves two questions.

1. What team are we talking about again?

2. When was the last time that the Yankees didn’t do anything?  And by this I mean, when was the last time the Yankees did not put a winning team out on the field?

If you could answer these two questions without much thought, then we are on the right page.  If you couldn’t answer these questions without having to search through a baseball almanac, or if you immediately started yelling at your computer screen because you hate where I am going with this, than you might just want to stop reading and find something else to do to waste your time.

So, if your still actually reading this, let me answer the questions I posed above.  First off, this team we are talking about is the New York Yankees.  The team we either love or hate.  For a team this polarizing, they must compete.  There is no “bridge year,” there is no “next year’s champion,” there is only the here and the now.  They have an image to keep, and more importantly, the have a new $1-billion-plus stadium they are interested in keeping your behind in. 

So, they can’t fail, they won’t fail.  They might not win the World Series, but they will keep you coming back for more.  They want you to root for them, they want you to hate them.  As long as we talk about them, they won’t stop trying to win.

Which, already answers my second question for me.  The Yankees haven’t had a losing record since 1992, when they went 76-86.  So what makes you think this coming season will be any different?  For God’s sake, it is only December 18.  Are they currently the best team on paper?  No.  Will they be when the season starts?  Maybe not.  Will they be competitive this season?  Very likely.

I guess what I am trying to say, in so many words, is that the Yankees are the Yankees and winning is what they do.  Yes, it must be nice for those Yankee haters out there right now when they can talk about how the Yankees won’t win and how Boston or some other team has overtaken them.  Let them enjoy it.  Let them talk about, it plays right into what the Yankees want.  And for all you Yankees fans out there walking around with brown paper bags over your head, really?  You must not know your own team.

For the Yankees know what needs to be done, and trust me, they will do whatever they can to accomplish that goal.  But in the meantime, relax, gloat; do whatever your crazy little heart desires.  But, when all is said and done, the sky won’t be falling; the sky will only be the limit.

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When you are a Yankees fan, there are only two possible outcomes: The Yanks win the World Series and reaffirm your belief that you indeed root for the best team under God’s blue sky, or the Yankees fail in their quest and you somehow begin to question the very existence of the Big Man himself.*

(*I never really question my faith, but it was the only effective metaphor I could think of at the time.  I do however find myself questioning my daily obsession of following their every move.  I swear off baseball and promise myself that I will never watch it again.  So, that means I am probably going to Hell because about a week in I renege on that promise and find myself counting down the days to pitchers and catchers.)  

Such is the mindset of these fans, myself included.  No matter how often it happens, if the Yankees SOMEHOW don’t win the Series, it still comes as a shock.  It’s sad, demoralizing and frankly, utterly unacceptable. 

However, when you try to explain these mixed emotions you are experiencing to somebody else, they look at you as if you are somehow unfit to receive their sympathy.  It is as if you are some disease-ridden individual to whom nobody wants anything to do with.  Also, if you try to explain these unsettling feelings to anybody outside of the Yankee fanbase, they ridicule you as if you were George W. Bush sitting right before them. 

It has been this way now for most of my 22 years and to be honest, I was beginning to think that we Yankee fans would be alone forever.  However, in the spirit of Christmas, a true miracle occurred! The Red Sox actually spent money on a Yankee level!  The winter skies opened up, the sun started shining and the birds starting chirping.  Even though I despise them and their fanbase to the very core of my being, there are finally other people out there who can now understand what my fellow Yankees enthusiasts and I have been having to deal with our entire lives.

Is this a sign?  Should I relent on my undying hatred toward a team that, in reality, has no effect on my actual well-being?†  So yes, I took the Red Sox’ recent trade for 1B Adrian Gonzalez and seven-year, $142M signing of LF Carl Crawford as just that—a sign. 

(†The Yankees shouldn’t have really any effect on how I live my life either, but let’s get real, they do.  I mean yeah I get upset and revert to the emotional level of a 12-year-old when they lose, but maybe that’s a personal problem.  Maybe I should look into this irrationality, but I digress.)

With these two huge, recent acquisitions, the Red Sox fans now have every reasonable expectation to believe that they should be considered World Series favorites.  It is with this, and the underlying fact that they won the World Series in ’04 and ’07, that they are now in the same room as the Yankees.  They are no longer just a team that Yankee fans love to hate, but a team that everybody will love to hate right there with the Yankees.  The both of them are one in the same now.  Now I have to listen to my roommate (Red Sox fan by the way, don’t ask) talk about this and that, and blah, blah, blah.  (I am sure I never sound like that at all right?  Yankee fans aren’t obnoxious whatsoever.)

Even though I hate to admit it, we Yankee fans need to realize the Red Sox are now just like us.  They have the money to spend and they sure do use it.  But now, as hard as it may be, we will have somebody else out there that finally knows how we feel.  And maybe, it won’t be so bad.

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