With practice starting on Monday, West Virgina’s new allegations and BP now blaming RR for the Gulf Oil Spill, I thought I would take a break from regular news and find some funny stuff to post.
First Funny
Comes from Michigan Football lover Danny Hope, head coach of the Purdue Boilermakers: “When he came to Purdue, it was as a transfer from Miami, and a lot of things [were] written about him, a lot of controversy. He’s done a great job fitting in. The team has embraced him. His teammates love him. Exceptional player and exceptional athlete and great teammate. We like everything about Robert Marve, and we certainly think he has the potential and talent for us to win on Saturday.”
I wasn’t aware Purdue had a game this Saturday? Maybe he meant August 14th? I wonder if Danny knows Michigan running backs coach Fred Jackson?
Second Funny
Comes from EDSBS on ESPN’s new college football announcer lineup. Warning! Paul McGuire in not on the list.
Here is a sample:
1: LIGHT AIR, RIPPLES WITH CRESTS ON THE WATER: Pam Ward and the Slumbertonez have been bumped down to ESPNU, where they will work the nooner with new analyst Danny Kanell. Awkward sexual tension to follow? No, we’re sorry: you must have this confused with the Mike Patrick/Craig James pairing, which does/will contain tons of simmering and forbidden passion. Bonus for people who hate Pam Ward: she’s no longer on ESPN [Numericals,] and thus off the basic cable run of easily flippable consecutive channels.
2. LIGHT BREEZE, BLOWIN’ TWIGS AROUND: Mike Bellotti will debut as an analyst, presumably smoking cigars on air lit with the money he took on the way out of Oregon. Brock Huard and Carter Blackburn are his partners. Predicted on-air banter: making fun of someone actually being named “Carter Blackburn,” and his resemblance to Chuck Bass.
Third Funny
Those New York Knicks sure love Isiah Thomas! Zeek must have a magic wand or something!
Fourth Funny
Albert Haynesworth’s knee is fine and he still didn’t do the conditioning drill. The Redskins must have loved to pay him that $21 million check a few months ago. He seems like a great investment.
Fifth Funny
Comes from our own freshman running back Stephen Hopkins during spring ball. See the picture above. I wonder how big those eyes will be when camp opens on Monday! Go get them big guy!
Sixth Funny
Comes from CB/Safety/Stand up comedian Troy Woolfolk:
“I feel like I actually chased a coach out of here,” he said, referring to Vance Bedford, who left to join Florida’s staff after Woolfolk’s freshman year and is now the defensive coordinator at Louisville. “My lack of knowledge almost caused him to get an aneurysm”
“Sometimes people don’t know what they’re doing,” Woolfolk said. “They come to me. That’s funny. I used to be that guy. I see how annoying it is. Every play, ‘Troy, Troy, what I got to do?’
So what would coach Bedford think of the Wolverines now relying on Woolfolk to direct traffic?
“We in trouble,” Woolfolk said.
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