This is NOT a list of the two greatest hitters for each team. This is a list of the greatest individual seasons for two hitters on each team.
Steroids are ignored. Barry Bonds is on this list. So is Alex Rodriguez (twice, actually, and not with the Yankees). Rafael Palmeiro, Manny Ramirez, and other known or assumed users are here.
Listed by division, not ranked by greatness.
Carl Crawford has been abysmal so far this season for the Boston Red Sox. He has swung and missed at countless pitches and struggled to time breaking balls.
He has not had the opportunity to steal bases because he has only been on base a handful of times, and Red Sox fans are beginning to panic that their team’s multimillion-dollar investment might not pay off.
Fans are concerned that Boston’s big market or the change to Fenway Park has negatively affected Crawford.
Yet slow starts are part of baseball. Just like the Red Sox started 0-6 but then won two of three against the New York Yankees, Crawford will begin to turn his season around in the near future.
I have made a decision: The 2011 major league baseball season began on April 8th.
I don’t need to hear you tell me that I’m crazy, or stupid, or ugly, or a pervert; the voices in my head tell me that all the time (especially Paul; he’s such a jerk!) This is not about logic, this is about survival. And we all know that the most important thing any organism can do, after eating deep-dish pizza, of course, is to survive. Don’t argue with me, I didn’t make the rules.
I have some solid, scientific evidence to back up my claim, too:
1. It was revealed that the Red Sox were not given a coffee grinder in either Texas or Cleveland and have been living off only store-bought Red Bull for a week. Some could argue that this is in direct violation of the Geneva Convention, making both the Rangers and Indians guilty of war crimes. But above all, it most certainly nullifies the first six games.
2. The Red Sox were also only given a draft copy of the 2011 season that had an additional six preseason games listed, and were never mailed the updated copy. They clearly weren’t really trying against Texas or Cleveland, they were still tuning up! Therefore, the early season losses were the fault of the commissioner, and possible Jerry Remy, not the team.
3. Also, Cleveland sets its rivers on fire every few years, which offers them a clear unfair psychological advantage that the league should investigate immediately (send in the UN).
4. Texas doesn’t really exist.
Given the irrefutable proof listed above, combined with an eloquent, beautiful and spectacular 2-1 series massacre against the arch-rival New York Yankees over the weekend that was in no way only a mediocre performance, I can only conclude that this team is back in shape and ready to show what they are truly made of (meat).
Of course, there are still concerns. The Red Sox did get rather poor pitching performances out of both John Lackey and Clay Buchholz, both of which failed to get out of the fifth with even a shred of dignity. Also, the Sox offense managed to strand 32 base runners. They seemed to get a dozen hits every inning but somehow almost never scored a run, a feat only accomplished by a team with an intimate knowledge of physics and a desire to lose spectacularly.
But the signs of life were unmistakable. Pedroia racked up an astounding nine hits to raise his season average to .400 (is it too early to compare him to Ted Williams?) and David Ortiz had four hits (all while looking fabulous!) while Youkilis seemed to walk more times than he had legal plate appearances (I suspect evil was somehow involved). And the main event, Josh Beckett, pitched a stellar, lights-out performance on Sunday, throwing 11 innings of shutout baseball, allowing only -1 walks and amassing 29 strikeouts en-route to a two-win outing. He was so good that the President called him to congratulate him on his effort, but he hung up because he’s from Texas.
Also, Jason Varitek looked annoyingly comfortable at the plate, something he has no business doing, as I had him all but written off as a ludicrously expensive bench coach for the remainder of 2011.
Carl Crawford still sucks, though.
Up next, the Red Sox welcome the Tampa Bay Rays to Fenway. This is a team so ungodly awful that they managed to become the one shining beacon of hope during the Red Sox’ 0-6 season start, similar to the emotion of seeing a haggard homeless person just a few minutes after being dumped by your girlfriend. If the Sox can take at least two games in the series and face Toronto with a 4-8 record or better, then I’d say the team is back on track and ready to make some noise (with a vuvuzela).
Until our next meet-up, stock pile your nachos and get ready to ride out an assuredly pleasant stretch of Red Sox victories; the 2011 season has just began, and I can quite clearly recall the media being certain that this team would manage to win 100 games, the World Series and cure cancer. It should be a lot of fun to watch…
…Unless they start to suck again…
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The 2011 Boston Red Sox were supposed to bring balance to the Force, not destroy it. Sadly after a 0-5 start, people are beginning to doubt whether or not this team is the powerhouse that ESPN spent all winter screaming about. Luckily it’s only April, there is still a lot of baseball left to be played. The Sox need help though, help that only one man can provide.
Charlie Sheen
That’s right. When you are losing, who better to turn to than a man who knows all about winning? Duh.
Charlie Sheen is bi winning. He wins here and he wins there. Where do the Red Sox win? Currently nowhere.
Critics call Charlie Sheen an addict. Many may doubt an addict’s ability to help a professional ballclub. But all Charlie Sheen is addicted to winning. The Sox seem to have gone cold turkey on winning.
Last time I checked, tiger blood was not on Major League Baseball’s list of banned substances. Even if it was, there won’t be a Mitchell Report to expose the Sox. George Mitchell had the Sox back the last go around, there’s no doubt he’ll turn a blind eye again.
Give Lester some tiger blood and he’ll be throwing no hitters every fifth day. I dare Ian Kinsler to try and swing at Lester’s fastball after he’s got some winning injected into him. The only bombs he’ll be dropping will be f-bombs in the locker room. Duh.
Tiger blood might help Jason Varitek remember the rules of baseball.
You’re either in Charlie Sheen’s corner or you’re with the trolls. Where do the Sox stand right now? 0-5. Looks like they’re with the trolls right now. The Baltimore Orioles are 4-1, looking much more Sheenish than the Sox. Is Red Sox Nation okay with that?
It is not too late for the Sox to get out of the troll’s corner. As Charlie Sheen said, “I’m so tired of pretending my life isn’t perfect and bitching and just winning every second and I’m not perfect and bitchin’.” I for one am tired of pretending the Red Sox aren’t perfect and winning every game. Enough’s enough.
Let the Red Sox and Charlie Sheen sit at the same dinner table and together embrace and feast on the bones of trolls.
One word can save the Sox and their savior Sheen has been saying it for weeks. Winning.
Duh.
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Daisuke Matsuzaka hasn’t won a game for the Boston Red Sox in a long time.
In his first start of the 2011 season, the Red Sox were defeated Wednesday night by the Cleveland Indians, 8-4. Matsuzaka pitched five innings, giving up six hits and three earned runs.
His last winning start was on September 2, 2010, against the Baltimore Orioles.
Matsuzaka’s struggles are consistent with those of his team, as the Red Sox are winless in their first five games of the 2011 season.
Coming into the 2011 season the Red Sox made headlines with the signings of Carl Crawford and Adrian Gonzalez. It was suggested the team would’ve made the postseason last year if not for the multitude of injuries they suffered.
Boston’s lineup looked poised to make a deep run into the postseason this season, and the Red Sox were considered the favorites by many to win the AL East and the World Series.
Rosters don’t win baseball games.
Carl Crawford isn’t quite living up to his $142 million contract. He has a miserable .211 batting average and six strikeouts. He has attributed his hitting slump to a lack of timing and plans to get in the batting cage to work it out.
The Red Sox have had a disastrous start, losing all five games so far this season, but Adrian Gonzalez has been worth the money. He’s batting .350 and slugging .600 with five RBI.
Gonzalez hit his first home run of the season against the Indians, but it wasn’t enough for Boston to get their first win.
The bullpen couldn’t keep the game within reach.
Matsuzaka left the game with the Red Sox trailing 3-2. Dennys Reyes and Dan Wheeler gave the game away in their relief appearances.
Reyes had a 16.20 ERA allowing three earned runs on only 12 pitches. Wheeler made it a full inning before being pulled with an 11.64 ERA after giving up a sixth inning home run to Asdrubal Cabrera.
The season is far from over, and Boston has plenty of time to rebound from their early struggles. Although it is still possible for them to win the AL East and eventually win the World Series, it isn’t probable.
No team has started a season 0-5 and went on to win a World Series.
If the Red Sox don’t win a game soon, it may be worth it to have Gonzalez come out of the bullpen.
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Although the Red Sox began the 2011 season with an embarrassing three-game sweep at the hands of the Texas Rangers, the Sox still have plenty of time to validate the media’s enormous expectations and secure a playoff spot.
However, in order to emerge victorious from a competitive American League East, the Sox must step back from the spotlight and focus on winning each individual game.
With a healthy and rejuvenated group of veterans, two superstar free agents acquisitions in Carl Crawford and Adrian Gonzalez, and a newly bolstered bullpen, the Sox are loaded with talent and can compete with any team in the league.
Nonetheless, it remains to be seen if the Sox can combine their enormous talent with the camaraderie and focus it takes to win the division.
As the dawn of the 2011 baseball season comes, one thing above all is certain: The 2011 Boston Red Sox are the greatest collection of baseball players ever to grace the game with their hallowed presence. Put this team against anyone, from any era, and they will stomp the snot out of them without even breaking a sweat. The 1927 Yankees? Don’t make me laugh! The 1998 Yankees? They had David Wells; need I say more? The 1932 Yankees…
Okay, enough with the Yankees. The point is, every newspaper, radio station, television analyst and homeless person has been telling us near nonstop just how undeniably, invariably and spectacularly awesome this team is.
I saw one such breakdown on a local sports network that claimed the Red Sox have a legitimate chance to sweep all major awards, win over 100 games, win the World Series, cure cancer and raise Papelbon from the dead. And I can’t think of a single reason to doubt their analysis.
Well, unless you count the three consecutive losses to start the year where they were outscored 26-11, Carl Crawford struck out five times and pitchers surrendered 11 home runs en route to a team ERA of 9.75 and a BA of .200…
But why would we worry about that? They were playing in Texas! If there is anything we can be more certain of other than the extreme talent possessed by Francona’s sexy, brooding squad of man-some is that Texas rarely obeys they laws of physics.
When a scientist tells a Texan that the Earth has gravity, a Texan will defiantly pull up his Wrangler’s, don a ferocious scowl and jump right off a bridge. And I think, as Americans, we should encourage this behavior.
The Sox have a much needed day off today before they head up to Cleveland, trying very hard not to touch anything on their trips to and from the ballpark. And I think the day off is a very good thing because it gives the Boston sports talk show hosts and diligent listeners a chance to completely flip out and threaten to kill everyone with fire.
I don’t believe I have ever seen a turnaround in faith this rapid and jarring since all the way back in the good ol’ days of 2010, which was the last time the Sox lost three or more in a row and made life not worth living anymore.
The only potential salvation lies in the arm of the Texan named Josh Beckett (assuming he hasn’t met any scientists recently), who spent most of 2010 trying to remember where his keys were. If it weren’t for the now infamous and successful transnational search, spearheaded by an international coalition of military forces, just before the winter meetings, Beckett might still be struggling.
We owe the outcome of this all-important game four to the men and women who gave the ultimate sacrifice to discover that the keys were actually on his counter the whole time, under a piece of paper that “wasn’t supposed to be there.”
I will join you again on Friday to discuss the arrival of the Yankees (the 2011 version, so don’t panic) at Fenway Park for this first time this season and chronicle their inevitable and merciless slaughter, unless, of course, they happen to win.
Where are my nachos?
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This is the sixth offering in my series of All-Franchise teams. Since Tampa Bay along with Florida are relatively new franchises, I have relaxed the rules a tad for the two. There is no minimum requirement as to tenure with the franchise. Unlike most franchises you will not find any current Hall of Famers on this list.
To combat my ignorance the first time I played fantasy baseball, I did what anyone does when they need answers: consulted the Internet. This was 2005—the Industrial Age for the web—so fantasy commentary was just starting to percolate “back then”; it wasn’t as obvious where to go for information.
What I couldn’t get my head around was a concept I kept reading about—this concept of Value. Only experience could help answer questions like:
“Should I reach for this pitcher, that won’t go for a few rounds, because he’s supposed to have a breakout season?”
“Should I take this proven third baseman in the fifth round, or wait until the thirteenth and take the guy that is supposed to be a HUGE sleeper?”
“Should I take this pitcher a little early since all the talent after him is in a lower value tier?”
These are (/should be) the conundrums running through a manager’s head on draft day and unless we attended each team’s Spring Training, we look to fantasy writers for insight.
Anyway, long story short, after exhaustively reading the experts and averaging rankings, (I was entering a keeper league that had three seasons under its belt.) the experts had Jason Schmidt ranked the highest of the available players. He was my first pick of the expansion draft.
Some of you just looked at your screen like I made an offhand child pornography joke. Yes, Jason Schmidt. The guy who dropped 18 W, 251 K, 3.20 ERA and 1.08 WHIP in 2004 and then followed up with a tepid 12 W, 165 K, 4.40 ERA and 1.42 WHIP in 2005—the year I took him. Ouch. (Who knows why he had the decline. It’s not like there have been substance abuse problems in baseball; I’m sure he just forgot to train in the offseason.)
So what did I learn, besides the concept of value and that drugs are bad? Take an expert’s opinion with a microscopic grain of salt.
You are dealing with one person who has to know the workings of 30 teams and countless prospects. When I mentioned my Schmidt pick to a buddy, a huge Giants fan, he burst out laughing. He wasn’t fooled; he knew the Giants had been playing with house money and that Schmidt was set for a regression. And my buddy didn’t play fantasy baseball.
Experts know they’re often throwing darts at the wall; they’ll always let you know once in a while that “Hey, I’m just one opinion, one voice; it’s worth what it cost you” and so on. But the problem is that often we don’t notice our favorite fantasy writer, despite his solid jokes, perpetual hangover, alleged womanizing and pop culture references, is not correct enough. His good writing blurs the fact that he’s not that good a fantasy analyst—at least no better than other writers, or even your own eyeballs.
So here’s what we’ll do: We’ll implement the Fantasy Pundit Accountability Act. We’ll have a fantasy league of fantasy writers. You don’t need to worry about drafting anyone, but every month or so, we’ll examine the big names in fantasy writing and compare how they’re doing against their preseason picks. And, perhaps, add a little “color commentary,” if you will.
Basic preseason rankings, (Top 25’s) from writer to writer, are rarely that different. The area of contention is when, despite common opinion, we’re told about Boom Guy or Bust Guy. We’re told their value isn’t what it seems. It’s when a writer implores us to take Andrew McCutchen before, say, Carl Crawford or after Torii Hunter. It’s when writers create such a debilitatingly persuasive argument, we have to draft Boom Guy or we’ll be positive our season is ruined. And it’s when they dissect Bust Guy’s splits so convincingly that we stare at the manager who ends up drafting him like he ate something from under the couch.
Because as Boom Guy kills our roster by playing like he spent the offseason bathing in a pool of chocolate syrup and Bust Guy looks like his offseason was spent in a pool of creatine (or related substance), we remember our source and wonder if it’s a federal offense to mail dog poop. (It is.) And, conversely, if Boom Guy plays like the stud he was supposed to be, we wonder if it’d be weird to email a screenshot of our league standings. (It would be.)
It’s a writer’s Sleeper/Busts, Breakout/Regression, Get/Get-Away lists that make or break a season.
That’s what we’ll compare and examine. Something like this:
| June 7th, 2011 | |||
| Joe Writer from Example.com | |||
| Player | Stephen Drew | Jose Bautista | Chase Utley |
| Prediction: Boom or Bust? | BOOM | BUST | BOOM |
| By how much? | Into top 3 SS | Back to his dismal 2009 numbers | Back to the #1 2B |
| Key Quote | “He has the speed for a dozen steals and has always had good power. Parra will mature and take walks, Young and Upton’s averages will improve and Drew reaps all the benefits.” | “His fly ball rate was so far off his career mark last year that I’d be surprised if he even topped 20 long balls this season.” | “Utley was simply hampered by fluke injuries last year; don’t let the final numbers fool you. He is still the games finest hitter at the 2-bag.” |
| And, actually…? | Drew is first among SS’s in RBI’s and Runs; he’s fourth in steals. [Writer] also said he spent all off-season working with a curveball specialist since that was what he struck out on the most. K’s are down by 7%. Good insight right there. | Wow. Bautista has hit 7 home runs in June. And it’s June 7th. I guess the prediction that he’d “plummet to the ground” didn’t specify which planet we were talking about. | Utley has made owners yank out some hair with only 3 RBI’s in his last 12 games. But that’s largely due to the poor hitting in front of him. He is back to stealing bases and hitting for a healthy average. He’s putting wood on the ball and staying healthy which is largely what was predicted. |
| Overall/By Position Composite Rank, Preseason (ESPN, Yahoo, CBS) | 98,7 | 40,6 | 15,2 |
| Overall/By Position Composite Rank (As of June 7th) | 33,2 | 3,1 | 29,3 |
| Grade | A+ | F | B – |
Bold predictions are what end up making a winning season; that’s why we look to the experts—their insights on which players will or won’t have that sacred Value.
Let’s see who’s getting it right. We’ll compile the major writers’ predictions in the next installment.
Stay tuned.
[Suggest a fantasy writer for review or a new field in the ratings system in the comments below or send Caleb an email. Become a Fan to avoid missing installments of the Fantasy Pundit Accountability Act.]
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Marco Scutaro was the “highlight” signing of 2009’s offseason. For those who are true fans and/or have played the game, you know that he was not the big solution. In fact, he should never have been signed in the first place. He is simply overpaid and overrated. If the Red Sox did want to sign him it should have been at a much cheaper annual salary.
Fans were becoming increasingly frustrated with the product being put on the field. No disrespect to Boston‘s finest, David Ortiz, Kevin Youkillis, Jon Lester and Dustin Pedroia but the fans simply did not feel that the overall product being presented to them correlated to the ticket prices they had to pay (the highest in all of baseball).
2010’s offseason was different. This offseason the Boston Red Sox were very busy and rightfully so. It is thought across the MLB that the Red Sox and the Phillies were the two teams that improved their teams the most this offseason. The Red Sox signed All-Star veterans Adrian Gonzalez (formerly of the San Diego Padres) and Carl Crawford (formerly of the Tampa Bay Rays). The Phils bolstered their starting pitching by signing Roy Halladay (formerly of the Toronto Blue Jays) and Cliff Lee (formerly of the Texas Rangers).
My question to you is…which player is better out of those the Red Sox signed and why? Is it the new Boston Left Fielder, speedy Carl Crawford or is it the always reliable, defensive machine Adrian Gonzalez?
Carl Crawford has tremendous speed, solid outfield play, a great bat and it seems like the only thing he can’t do is fly. Adrian Gonzalez is not quite as mobile but has more pop with his bat and is probably an even better defender at his position (1B) than Crawford is at his (LF). Gonzalez does not have much speed but he has a detailed goatee which gives him extra brownie points.
Gonzalez’s goatee aside and being completely serious, Carl Crawford seems to be the better overall player. It will be interesting to see them play on the same team as they should fuel one another’s game and they will likely have career years in 2011.
It’s an exciting time to be a Boston Red Sox fan.
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